adharma: (pic#999659)
Acedia // Mukuro Rokudou ([personal profile] adharma) wrote2011-12-19 06:28 pm
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QUESTION MEME

OK I BROKE 30K I AM ALLOWED.

For Acedia, Aeris and Alexiel.

I also NPC Sleeping Beauty, Cheshire Cat, Dream and Three of Three and will field questions about them as well, though I retain the right to ~ * spoilers * ~ not answer.

ASK ME THINGS. I will be picking at this for at least a week +A+!

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 04:02 am (UTC)(link)
I HAD FUN

it was definitely complicated to get at start, but it did have a high fun curve once the initial how does i wore off

also i SHOULDN'T HAVE PLAYED THREE but i am so glad I did because basically i love what happened to everyone '-'

TALK TO ME ABOUT ACEDIA'S DAWN FEELINGS AT THIS MOMENT
toolate: (i'll shoot him up)

[personal profile] toolate 2011-12-20 04:35 am (UTC)(link)
HILARIOUS...?? He's always sort of been stumbling but the fictional thing really just pulled the rug out from under him and. he's still falling. (I had intended for him to discover that later, but I failed to realize that ... like 70% of his memories mention it or heavily imply it. WHUPS!) He's really having difficulty getting his footing again and is pretty much grasping for anything that might keep him somewhat steady. HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH HIMSELF so he goes in circles, lashes out at others, hurts himself, gets depressed, shoves his feelings away, etc etc etc! His emotions and his views/perspective is a mess. He understands he needs intervention or help (and he's slowly starting to realize he's completely incompetent alone) but he doesn't understand the proper sort he needs so he's reaching out to people for quick-fix solutions. Riful is the most prominent of these solutions \:B/

One of the ways Drift tries to deal with his feelings is pain! He has so many negative feelings he feels are right and he's gone through the logic a thousand times and he honestly wants to vent them somewhere/to be punished for his perceived misdeeds (verbally or physically)/etc. A lot of this is contributed to by the fact that no one will walk him through his feelings (which totally makes sense as his feelings are kind of ridiculous to deal with, but) and instead just deny his feelings or tell him not to think that way. HE CAN'T UNDERSTAND THAT and it just makes him more frustrated and at a loss, because not only does he feel horrible he's being told his feelings are wrong and imagined and he loses his footing on everything again, which just screws him up more. PAIN AND SELF-DEPRECATION ARE REALLY EASY SOLUTIONS and he can't fathom the harder ones so he keeps. going back to these things. And if he can for sure get a foothold on something easy to understand (like these two things) then he can start trying to refigure his perspective/etc to try and stabilize. some things.

RIFUL GIVES HIM THIS AND EXTRA. It's sort of an ongoing trainwreck so I can't give a super solid answer, but Riful went in and started rearranging things and forced her way inside him. And he's okay with this! Because not only is he flagellating him the way he wants she is offering herself as someone to center himself around, and as someone who will own him and never let him think again if he doesn't want to. He really, really likes the idea of being dominated and owned, especially since Riful stresses how much he's the ~only one~ and all that. This doesn't address any of his issues or fix anything! But it gives him a place to anchor himself and thus return to if there's something he can't handle, whether it be someone/thing else or himself.

Bbbbut. Drift also knows he "needs" this. Which means that, since it's in his grasp, he is going to keep it no matter what. So, to an extent, while Riful has full ownership of Drift, he is also using her to satisfy himself. He thinks it's a fair payoff, especially since he's already promised to give all of himself to Riful (partly because she owns him and he thinks it's right, and partly out of compensation for him using her). What's more, Riful identifying herself with Alice both distanced him from her (hence why he doesn't feel guilty in the slightest despite Riful's rather honest proclamations of love) and also made him more willing to brutalize him. HE WILL LIE AND BEND THE TRUTH ALL HE NEEDS TO IF HE CAN KEEP THEIR RELATIONSHIP LIKE THIS it satisfies him in so many ways.

OH and I almost forgot! Because he ~belongs to Riful~ and she promised to kill him and eat him properly, he's also become less ... inclined to get himself offed or killed? Or indulge in masochism during games. However, feelings-wise he still wants to die/disappear (which is why he is okay with Riful's proposition to begin with) and he's not monogamous to one sadist, though Riful's level of pain (+his simultaneous psychological breakdown during each thread) is pretty extreme so he's sort of been spoiled by her :B

tl;dr UNSTABLE, but doing better now that he has someone to focus himself on. So trading in instability points for unhealthy points I guess :|aaa

Does Acedia have any CR that's bad/unhealthy for him rn . . .
andallthekingsmen: tsun chill ? (Bastard)

[personal profile] andallthekingsmen 2011-12-20 05:04 am (UTC)(link)
NO

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 05:14 am (UTC)(link)
IN THE WAY THAT 'MUKURO IS GAY' IS ACCURATE.
toolate: (◆ remember)

[personal profile] toolate 2011-12-20 05:39 am (UTC)(link)
FINE gosh. tell me about your healthy cr.

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 05:47 am (UTC)(link)
Nooot really. He has very little conceptual basis for what is 'healthy'. He doesn't know what the right way to do things is, so he doesn't know his way is wrong. he knows it's often not what people want, but he's pretty good at accepting the result even if the foundation is shitty.

He does realize when he has fucked up sometimes, but he isn't very good at tracing the problem to it's source. So it's more like "I messed up by letting Three take my sense of touch without realizing how it would hurt the people around me and eventually break me" but not "I wouldn't have let Three take my sense of touch if I thought what I want or what I am afraid of had any meaning".

BOY NEEDS SOME SERIOUS FUCKING THERAPY. and unfortunately he can't bff with lucifer because I play him. and while a lot of characters are good at solving problems or helping with self esteem, hilariously few are good therapists '-';;

WHAT MEMORY DID ALEXIEL GET BACK...
glorious: Van looking up at a source of light (light)

[personal profile] glorious 2011-12-20 05:50 am (UTC)(link)
He's heard a bit about people wanting 'revenge' on him from Dawn, but that's pretty much it. Everyone's been playing the DON'T TELL HIM game (which I OOCly appreciate as that means Van won't get spoiled for his first playthrough of Tales of Being The Hugest Douchebag) so he...basically knows he did something that angered people and not much else. '_'

...I think I am out of questions now fff. At some point I'll have to read Reborn, won't I?

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 05:59 am (UTC)(link)
I FIGURED IT WAS BECAUSE YOU WANTED PEOPLE TO NOT KNOW WHAT THEY WERE WHEN PICKING, NOT AFTER THEY WERE PICKED '-'

...which... problems...

Also does this mean she knows Lucifer = Nanatsusaya = lol
glorious: (intrigue)

[personal profile] glorious 2011-12-20 06:15 am (UTC)(link)
I did manage to get through Naruto but I do think that it is genuinely one of the...easier shounens to get into. That still took me like three months to get through, and I feel like something is missing now I don't have a ridiculously long shounen manga tab up all the time. '_'

I would say that the anime is good enough at what it does: condescend the main story of the game into twenty-six episodes. I imagine there are moments that would be hard to follow without prior game knowledge and some of the battles are uh, anti-climatic due to obviously being rushed, but on the other hand there are some scenes that translated really well. If you don't have access to the game, then the anime is the best substitute for it.

If you have the patience for it though, I am pretty sure there's a few loooong LPs of it on Youtube. I haven't taken a real look at many of them yet and can't offer recommendations, but that too is an option and it'll give you the sidequests as well.
heliokleptic: /// tsun derp chill (I try to tame this mind)

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 06:22 am (UTC)(link)
WELL

For one I guess Dawn can't really organize problems very clearly. like throws basically anything that isn't ordinary rationality into 'crazy'. But he is pretty good at understanding the motives behind those actions.

So it's more like a series of unfortunate events...

Acedia was tortured as a child and the other mafia families attacked him instead of saving him >> Acedia hates the mafia

Acedia was tortured as a child >> Acedia doesn't care if he gets hurt

Acedia's life has always been horrible >> Acedia has a lot of nightmares

Acedia has never been around people much and doesn't examine his feelings >> Acedia doesn't know how to feelings

Acedia is an illusionist who lives through lies >> Acedia has a hard time with truth

The only thing Acedia has ever trusted or relied on were chikusa and ken >> team is really important to Acedia

Acedia has never has his feelings of love called that >> Acedia doesn't get love

Those are... some of the main ones. These are of course very simple (and sometimes just wrong) explanations, but they're how Luke sees them, and he generally right about the outcome, if not the cause. When he CAN'T see a cause he has a harder time recognizing the outcome as a problem tho. For example, he doesn't think of Acedia's thing with Nii as rape waiting to happen, cuz even tho it's sort of weird in that Acedia only seems to frustrate himself with it, he doesn't really know where it comes from, and assumes it's just some weird mindgame... But without knowing the origin of that it's just like 8|a? *Shrug*?

DAWN WINS AND VAN LEARNS TO LOVE HIM. what Acedia do.
heliokleptic: chill srs (I'm feeling right)

[personal profile] heliokleptic 2011-12-20 06:47 am (UTC)(link)
oh god

jump into the ice cold deep end and never look back 8D;

HE WOULD JUMP FEET FIRST AND HE WOULD LOOK but he would... still jump....

And therapists everywhere would put their head in their hands and cry...

There is basically no way for Dawn to have a truly healthy relationship with Van. Even if Van was genuinely repentant and genuinely loved him, it doesn't change the fact that Dawn is basically brainwashed to love him and he is central to every single one of Dawn's defining issues. The only healthy relationship they could have would be if Dawn rejected him, because that would meant Dawn has self worth enough to realize that regardless of Van's regrets he basically build and systematically destroyed Luke for his own purposes, without a shred of guilt. And that that isn't acceptable or the foundation for any kind of happiness!

But he will never be healthy enough to reject him so any kind of 'positive' relationship would still be fundamentally mindbendingly terrible. Doesn't really matter if it was sexual, parental, or friendship.

BUT Dawn would not only do it but he would defend Van the entire way 8D;

i think i am out '-'.....

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