IT IS SLIGHTLY LESS PRECARIOUS NOW THAN IT WAS THE OTHER DAY. Since for a few days Souya has been teetering on Mukuro trying to decide if he should just cut Souya out or not. But the biggest thing is that Souya . . . follows through on what he says? He doesn't say Oh I'll Do This and then not do it. Sort of REPEATED MOMENTS OF SOUYA NOT BEING A LYING DICKFACE has made Mukuro be like :|aaa is this a thing that happens with some people??? And Souya isn't like lol you're a freak well maybe Souya thinks that but it isn't the same sort of reaction he gets from other people so. He feels like Souya most meets him halfway. Because there's the other kids who don't feel :B (Kaworu, Cubia, he guesses Mytho but he doesn't really like Mytho because Mytho doesn't talk :|a) and then the knights who don't (Datura and Riful - but neither have the philosophical/curiousness that Mukuro finds solidarity in just the not-feelings part of it) and then EVERYONE ELSE. WHO IS ALWAYS LIKE BLAH BLAH FEELINGS ARE NORMAL BLAH BLAH ETC BLAH. And in general everyone else doesn't bother trying to see or work with Mukuro's perspective at all and they're really bad at picking up any hints he drops. I MEAN ADMITTEDLY SOMETIMES MUKURO DROPS REALLY BAD HINTS LIKE 'IT'S OKAY IF YOU'RE BROKE, YOU'RE STILL RUBY' ISN'T SUPER EASY FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO FIGURE OUT but that frustrates him \o/ Why should I botherrrr. But Souya tries? And Mukuro kind of. HE DOESN'T REALLY KNOW WHY AND HE STILL THINKS SOUYA DOESN'T LIKE HIM BUT HAS SOME OTHER MOTIVE but. he can't. really. figure it out. But he doesn't really get 'like' as a freestanding concept at the time unless you're the duck.
OH BUT THE FRUSTRATION. right. Because Souya is basically the 'good influence' -- since Mukuro has other positive relations but they don't try to make him not be crazy they're just positive -- any time it is like THIS IS A QUANDARY DO I DO THE RIGHT THING OR THE WRONG THING Mukuro already has the tyranny of shoulds going on and then sometimes (? on occasion) he thinks about the shoulds with Souya and is like \o/ blaugh what is this no it's frustrating and sucks. LUKE IS SAD => DON'T BE A DICK TO LUKE => FAIL TO HELP ALSO LUKE DIDN'T GET IT => FRUSTRATION chain is like Souya's fault almost directly :Db
HE HAS PROBABLY COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT HE DOESN'T JUST WANT TO CUT THINGS TO CUT THEM which is kind of more annoying. But Souya offering was like of like :/a hm that seems unsatisfying. If he were really in a downswing of like SOCIOPATHY he'd probably take Souya up on it anyway because it would be at least a little cathartic but the power play isn't right for him to really feel good about it. ALSO HE WOULD PROBABLY FEEL KIND OF BAD IF HE FUCKED SOUYA UP BUT NOT KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THAT AND GO FUCK SOMEONE ELSE UP TO FEEL BETTER :') look at that vicious cycle yo.
annnddd I guess if Mukuro ever thinks Souya has fucked him over in some way or isn't being honest he will just cut off the relationship \:D/ HA MY WORLDVIEW WAS RIGHT YOU ARE AN UNTRUSTWORTHY ADULT BLAH BLAH or whatever. :3c
no subject
OH BUT THE FRUSTRATION. right. Because Souya is basically the 'good influence' -- since Mukuro has other positive relations but they don't try to make him not be crazy they're just positive -- any time it is like THIS IS A QUANDARY DO I DO THE RIGHT THING OR THE WRONG THING Mukuro already has the tyranny of shoulds going on and then sometimes (? on occasion) he thinks about the shoulds with Souya and is like \o/ blaugh what is this no it's frustrating and sucks. LUKE IS SAD => DON'T BE A DICK TO LUKE => FAIL TO HELP ALSO LUKE DIDN'T GET IT => FRUSTRATION chain is like Souya's fault almost directly :Db
HE HAS PROBABLY COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT HE DOESN'T JUST WANT TO CUT THINGS TO CUT THEM which is kind of more annoying. But Souya offering was like of like :/a hm that seems unsatisfying. If he were really in a downswing of like SOCIOPATHY he'd probably take Souya up on it anyway because it would be at least a little cathartic but the power play isn't right for him to really feel good about it. ALSO HE WOULD PROBABLY FEEL KIND OF BAD IF HE FUCKED SOUYA UP BUT NOT KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THAT AND GO FUCK SOMEONE ELSE UP TO FEEL BETTER :') look at that vicious cycle yo.
annnddd I guess if Mukuro ever thinks Souya has fucked him over in some way or isn't being honest he will just cut off the relationship \:D/ HA MY WORLDVIEW WAS RIGHT YOU ARE AN UNTRUSTWORTHY ADULT BLAH BLAH or whatever. :3c
you should reverse me because i wrote you more :(